My Father

always said that this world is a war on morals and values, meaning if the world can influence you to disregard your morals for value, then the world has won and rules over you. As previously mentioned, I inherited a lot more from my father than I would have previously admitted.

After many, many years of experiencing my father’s rules of engagement they stuck to me. I’d like to share them with you, but there’s a disclaimer: Neither he nor I followed these rules to a tee. He excelled in some while I excelled in others. Another disclaimer: a couple of these lessons may piss you off depending on your race, sex, and ideological beliefs in general. Regardless, these are some tips he hoped I lived and loved by. Let’s get started.

1. Things Come And Go

Money, lovers, your career, your home, and your status are in a constant state of evolution. Life is full of ebbs and flows. We will all experience its ups and downs, or moments of abounding and abasing. The lifelong lessons are to prepare for the drought and to avoid attachment to material things. I’m reading a scripture today, out of a Bible that was passed down to my grandmother, and now unto me. As I began to read it, I felt that sense of purpose and a sense of peace. I felt connected to my God and ancestors, which is something I’d been missing for a while.

In Luke 12, the messiah explains the essence of having. ( Now I’ve never done a sermon before, so bear with me.) Luke 12:15 And he said unto them, Take heed; and beware of covetousness: for a man’s life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he possesseth.

Luke 12:22 And he said unto his disciples, Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat; neither for the body, what ye shall put on.

Luke 12:28-31 If then God so clothe the grass, which is to day in the field, and to morrow is cast into the oven; how much more will he clothe you, O ye of little faith? And seek not ye what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink, neither be ye of doubtful mind. For all these things do the nations of the world seek after: and your father knoweth that ye have need of these things. But rather seek ye the kingdom of God; and all these things shall be added unto you.

The good book said it: Life has demands. Sometimes the economy gets so bad, and our funds so low, that we wonder if God is fully aware of them. God absolutely is. Are we aware of God’s demands? Of God’s everlasting love and faith? Shifting the priority from lack to faith isn’t always easy, but we should expect life to come with challenges. Arm yourself for the storms, hardships, and the breaks. Luke 12:37-40. Go look that one up yourself. Instead of worrying about what you or everyone else has, focus on building your relationship with God. I’ll let y’all know how it goes for me.

2. Don’t Get Got: Biblical Wisdom for Real Life

My father grew up in the DMV, my mother, NYC. I’m the first generation born down here in Georgia, with my inherited city feet and hints of northern slang. In life, you learn the general street lessons: look behind you every once in a while when walking solo, don’t believe everything people tell you, etc., etc. Navigating the community, the enemy, and the system relies upon both survival instincts and what you’ve been taught. And staying on theme, the Bible gives great examples of how to deal with people, enemies, and systems of oppression.

Did Rick say this verbatim? No, I don’t think so. Have I gathered it from his being? Absolutely. I’ve also done my own research. Let me give you one example from the Bible about navigating other humans; a tidbit of street knowledge.

Jacob & Esau

Jacob and Esau were twins, but they didn’t look the same. (This reminds me of Cain and Abel.) Esau came out red and hairy, and Jacob’s description isn’t detailed. During labor, Esau was born first with Jacob coming second, “clinging to his heel.” This was symbolic of the fact that Jacob would be fighting for dominance over Esau throughout their lives.

In their younger ages, Esau would hunt extensively for the family. After one of these hunts in particular, he was completely famished. Jacob, who had been home cooking stew, offered some to Esau, but only if Esau gave up his firstborn birthright, which he did. In the following moments, Jacob prepared a stew while disguised as Esau and brought it to their father’s deathbed. Isaac then blessed Jacob instead of Esau.

That’s the half and not the whole of the story. But we’ll pause here. Jacob tricked his brother into giving up his birthright blessing. What did I think when I read it over? Don’t find yourself hungry, especially around someone who wants what you have. It reminds me of when I took a position that was a step backward professionally. In July of 2024, I had been searching for a job since being laid off mid-march. Not being able to go out, get my nails and hair done, or purchase gifts for Mother’s Day was really getting to me at the time. I took a lot of interviews, and as I finished a solo trip in London for a week-long Fundraising program, (S/O Leadership Institute) I found many of these jobs wanted to interview me.

Their correspondences were ominously… engaged. I finally felt like I was getting closer to that big break. But it would prove, after taking a position with a company post two interviews in the span of a week (unheard of in 2024), that not only had I taken a step backwards professionally, I had also walked myself into the (2nd) most toxic job environment I had ever worked in. I turned down interviews and stopped applying. I rushed to be fed and walked into a job that drained me completely.

While my time, energy, and talents weren’t acknowledged in the new workplace, and they sure did squeeze every drop of talent, energy, and gas money they could out of me before deciding to let me go. There were so many other opportunities that would have been more aligned with my goals had I waited and explored my options. Like Esau, I gave up something long-term for the sake of immediate relief. I would have never experienced that career trauma had I delayed my desire to be fed.

Can you apply it to some instances in your life? Has anyone been able to offer less for your time and energy? Did they get you on a discount? Were you hungry, broke, horny, or needed a joint? Then that’s probably why.

In turn, I’d like to say the stories of Esther and Christ the Messiah are also filled with instances of being clever and wise; traits of Street Smarts. Esther was clever in her approach when asking the king to reverse his assistant’s workings to kill all Jews in the empire. She got the king all riled up and made him wait days for the answer that would appease his queen. He got hungry.

Christ the Messiah dealt with literal fans, police, paparazzi, and the like. He imparted wisdom, stopped stonings, and tore up a temple. And he traveled with actual, known gangsters. While the Bible is full of some weird moments, Christ’s life definitely seems like a season of Atlanta. Lots of good stuff there in a local Bible near you!

One thing these two shared was their spiritual toolbook. I’ll be honest, I believe in magic. I believe there are different kinds too. A common theme between these two figures is fasting. It’s true. You will not find Matthew 17:21 in these new Bibles. Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting. Fasting is multifaceted. It’s a cleanse, a commitment, and a spiritual charging. I’m not trying to tell you how to brew a witch’s stew, but what I will say is: If you want the universe to move for you and if you’re looking to sway things your way, fast first.

3. Holidays are Pagan Holy Days

Sorry to get on my conspiracy soap box and stay on my biblical soap box, but that’s just the type of conversations I had with my father! I dedicate this entire blog to him! My father made me watch YouTube videos about the true meaning of Easter, the Oedipus complex, Santa Claus, and all of the things while he had me for a weekend or so. So I’d think he’d be happy that I reiterate that holidays are just pagan holy days. And you can’t avoid them. Try going to a bank on a holy-day. You can not do business.

What does Pagan even mean? I had to look it up myself, though I’ve heard it my entire life. Pagan means a person holding religious beliefs other than those of the main or recognized religions. That’s Google’s definition, ChatGPT told me Paganism means to worship multiple Gods. That connected the dots, because transition from polytheism to monotheism is most notable in Egypt, under the rule of Pharoah Akhenaten (originally known as Amenhotep IV).

This spills into a deeper, much more spiritual (of course) subject: be aware of the gods you are serving. The Bible mentions several lesser gods. Your attention and energy are the powers that keep these beings alive, and they are being misdirected. This energy needs to go to the one true God. I’ve never seen the show American Gods (might be good to start tonight) but I’d bet my last dollar that they’re letting us in on a forbidden secret about lesser gods utilizing our energy, praises, and attention.

Let’s put energy into perspective. There’s a scripture, Philippians 3:19 Their end is their destruction, their god is their belly, and they glory in their shame, with minds set on earthly things. Upon hearing this in 2019 while shooting the shit with a former friend, it made me think: Am I someone who primarily prays, or only prays, when they’re about to eat? Have I ever made hunger my god? (There’s that word again.) If I want to solidify to TMH that hunger is not my god, maybe I should make prayer a priority outside of eating a meal. Maybe I shouldn’t spend most days smoking after I was blessed to wake up. Just a thought.

4. The Importance of Men and Women

Now let me start by saying, I toned the title of this one down. My father was headstrong and loud about it. The Gemini in him brought the facts and structure — but not the emotional tact. My father said “Don’t marry anyone who didn’t grow up in a two-parent household.” That’s my rule, not yours. No, he did not specify that they had to be your biological parents. No, he didn’t have a standard for the quality of the relationship between the two. Come to think of it, I don’t think we ever got to talk about toxic relationships much, and that’s surprising because I’m an Aquarius… and he’s a Gemini.

I don’t believe those raised by single parents are undatable. But I, being the big-brain that I am, ate the fish (while I made some bread) and spit out the bones. (I actually fried the fish, but that’s beside the point.) What I took from this is that humans, especially little humans, need to see how both men and women behave and interact. Whether at home, in public, or in institutional settings, men and women have proven differences between each other. We think differently. We definitely love differently. And we solve problems differently.

Having a healthy exposure to men and women is not restricted to just immediate guardians and nuclear families. Community members, teachers, and other adults are constantly shaping young people’s perception of what mature men and women are and do in this world. While I don’t share his hardline stance, I think the underlying message was about witnessing balanced interaction between masculine and feminine energy, however that shows up.

5. White People

Ifykyk. And I don’t mean to offend, even though I’m sure I did. If you find one common thing about the Black experience, it’d be White people. We have our ways, and you have yours. We’re also all equipped with a general history of America, that’s, honestly, a bit too recent for comfort. I don’t think y’all care. And I’ve always said, the White people that get it are so super, extra nice. I see you.

This isn’t victim hood mentality. It’s exactly the opposite. I don’t need your validation, and you obviously don’t need mine.

6. The Bible Stands For Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth

This rule has always been my father’s favorite. Rick definitely instilled a sense of reading the Bible, understanding scripture, and being able to recount it on hand, in me. As I get older, I’m getting back to my studies. I’m finding conflict with life, self-doubt, inner turmoil, and the feeling of lack. And I think this one rule can help all of those things.

In my terms: The 10 Commandments logically build character and make living with others easier. Live a life where you don’t have to lie, don’t dishonor your parents by calling them out their name or by being ungrateful for their sacrifices, and obviously (you would think) don’t desire your friends’ significant others. You’ll likely avoid fights with family. You’ll avoid guilt and consequences from covering up a lie, and you’ll ruin spiritual bonds that add to your life rather than take from it. Another scripture, Matthew 11:30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.

7. You Are Not Confused (And Everyone Knows It Too)

This might be more for me, but I’m sure there’s a few of you out there that resonate. My father told me that I am not confused. I know right from wrong spiritually. He told me other people can see it, especially my friends. I brushed it off for years.

Thinking back as I’ve recently wiped my slate of friends, my main crew kept trying to get me to attend sex clubs. Initially, I was interested. I definitely went to a kinky kickback and watched, I won’t lie. I wanted to see more, but time away from the opportunity fizzled out the desire. What’s crazy is some of the ladies in my group were against these acts completely. Over time, it seems I’m the only one who never made it to Trapeeze. And I thank God for that.

I know where I’m headed, and my alignment with my vision is imminent. I’ve never stopped pushing for God, for growth, and to leave a massive positive impact on this world. I know I will. And I thank YAH for that.

That’s wraps! These are a few of the things that have never left me. I hope this can be useful for you, or entertaining at the least. It’s definitely serving its purpose for me.

But it is about that time.

And until we meet again,

you know all you have to do in this life is:

STAY _____ & ___ !!